5 REASONS CHURCH PLANTING WILL RUIN YOUR LIFE

Thinking of starting a new church from scratch?

Got the itch to "graduate" from leading the youth group to becoming the lead pastor of your own thing?

Sure, church planting looks hot and sexy on Instagram, but take it from me, there are 5 Reasons Church Planting Will Ruin Your Life:

5.  Get Used To Being Broke.

You will never have all the resources you used to have at your cushy, all-expenses-paid, endowed former established church.  Church planting is like Adulting for Church Leaders: you'll learn very quickly that receipts matter and you'll have to get used to raising cash for your salary and ministry needs.   

The good news?  You're reaching people far from God.  The bad news?  Baby Christians don't tithe. 

There's a reason the Apostle Paul wrote so many fundraising letters (I'm looking at you, 2 Corinthians).  Stop whining and get used to it.

4. Get Used to Being Misunderstood.

You're a dreamer, like Joseph.  You can pitch a crowd on what could be and what should be with both hands tied behind your back and blindfolded.  Vision is just your thing.

And because you're seeking to persuade people to join your cause, you will be misunderstood.  Some church people will assume you're in it for the money (*ahem* See #5 above). Others will think you want to become the next attention-starved Celebrity Pastor.

Here's the thing: They won't actually come to you with their "concerns."  Instead of a face-to-face conversation, misunderstandings happen through behind-the-scenes condemnation.  You'll be going through life, doing ministry, minding your own business when WHAM-O!  You're socked from the rear by a book-length Facebook post that tags everyone in your church.

Not cool, but it really does happen.  A lot.

Whatever the case, just remember that passive aggressiveness is not a fruit of the Spirit.  Put on that Ephesians 6 Armor and suck it up because being misunderstood sucks.

3.  Get Used to Having Zero Vacation Time.

When you're the only staff member on staff, who can you trust to fill in for you?  Further, if you really do believe that every Sunday is somebody's first Sunday, do you want their first Sunday to be a JV experience?

You see, it's not that you don't have dedicated, carved out vacation time on the calendar... It's that you are constantly in Vision / Survival Mode and it requires your direct attention.  This makes missing a Sunday nearly impossible.  Is this healthy?  No, and that is why you will need to really think through a strategy for getting dedicated time off to recharge your batteries.

2. Get Used to the High Turn-Over Rate.

Just like Shakira's hips, statistics don't lie.  Do you know what percentage of your church start-up will experience turnover two years in?  100%.  That's right, complete turn-over. 

Starting a church from scratch requires sacrificial amounts of energy, time, giving, and buy-in.  It will wear on your people over time.

Get ready for experiencing pain.  In fact, your pain threshold is also your leadership lid.  Love people and hold them loosely with open hands.  Bless them on the way out but don't be shocked when they're on their way out.

1.  Get Used to Collapsing at Jesus' Feet.

At the end of the day, Jesus is the Senior Pastor of your church; you're just an undershepherd (see 1 Peter 5).  This means that He is responsible for what happens in your church start-up, not you.  It's His church, not yours. 

And so you can cast your cares on Him because He really, really does care for you. 

Collapsing at Jesus' Feet gets you off your pedestal and into a position of submission.  Advancing the church on your knees is the best strategy for reaching people far from God.

REORGANIZED RELIGION: THE RESHAPING OF THE AMERICAN CHURCH AND WHY IT MATTERS

Award-winning reporter and Pulitzer grantee Bob Smietana has a new book coming out that all church leaders need to get their hands on.  Reorganized Religion: The Reshaping of the American Church and Why It Matters is the rare book that I simply could not put down.  

Using his deft writing skills combined with the most recent statistical findings and anecdotes makes for a compelling book that will help church leaders make better decisions and experience fewer regrets.

Divided into three sections, Reorganized Religion opens by reorienting our post-pandemic church reality with Part One: Where We Stand.  These opening chapters are chock full of startling statistics:

• According to Pew Research in late 2021, 3 out of every 10 Americans (29 percent) is a so-called None, someone who claims no religious identity, up from only 16 percent in 2017. (p. XV)
  

• The percentage of Christians in America has dropped from 78 percent to 63 percent. (p. XV)
  

• Less than half of Americans say they belong to a church, down from 70 percent of Americans in the 1990's, according to the Gallup polling organization. (p. 6)
  

• Less than one-third of Americans, when asked, say they have gone to a worship service within the past week. (p. 6)
  

• Where congregations still persist despite enormous challenges and an uncertain future is where they offer two key benefits: a sense of community and a sense of mission to rally around. (p. 9)
  

• We are living in the early days of what Pew Research has labeled "the Next America" - a new nation that differs substantially from its past in profound ways.

Part Two: Why People Are Leaving shares rich, in-depth stories of real Americans who have survived the tumultuous years of the pandemic only to emerge into a post-Christian America where churches and pastors are viewed through a lens of distrust.

Author Smietana writes, "Many church leaders find themselves in a position of authority, with the ability to make decisions that can change the course of institutions, at exactly the time when titles no longer matter -- and where relationships and influence mean more than authority" (p. 91).  

In my own experience, I can echo this observation and verily testify to the power of influence over title.  After years of evangelical scandals (i.e. Willow Creek, Mars Hill), the 'trust revolution' has touched us all (p.94).  Smietana dives deeper into the troubled waters and the inherent fragility of church leadership models by saying, "A fallen small-church pastor is a problem.  A fallen megachurch pastor is a disaster" (p. 101).

Part Three bravely asks the question, Where Do We Go From Here?  This is where I found the book weaker in prescriptive advice.  While I appreciated the stories of churches merging together and tackling social ills without including political power, I was disappointed that evangelism and church planting were not addressed as part of the American Church's solution for the future.  

One area I did agree with is Smietana's assertion that the future belongs to multiethnic churches, defining as a multiracial congregation as one that includes 20% or more of participants not being part of the dominant racial group in that religious community (p. 197).  America's racial demographics are continuing to thrust us all into the future and the American Church has a lot of ground to make up for (or else fall by the wayside as irrelevant).

In summary, I highly recommend this book.  Reorganized Religion: The Reshaping of the American Church and Why It Matters will challenge your understandings of today's religious landscape while informing you on pathways forward in the age of the Nones.

3 PRINCIPLES I LEARNED WHILE AT THE WHITE HOUSE

In 2020 (one week before the world shut down because of COVID), I was invited to The White House for a Special Briefing for Leaders of Faith.

Here are 3 principles I learned while at The White House…

1. THE CHURCH SHOULD BE APOLITICAL

We’re a big tent -- we welcome everybody here!  That means we fight for our unity: no gossip, no griping, we just don’t have time for that:

"But the one who slanders you behind your back

proves that he’s a fool, never to be trusted. If you keep talking, it won’t be long

before you’re saying something really wrong.” (Proverbs 10:18-19)

"Words that bring delight pour from the lips of the godly,

but the words of the wicked are duplicitous.” (Proverbs 10:32)

"When you act with presumption,

convinced that you’re right,

don’t be surprised if you fall flat on your face!

But walking in humility helps you to make wise decisions.” (Proverbs 11:2)

I love our church because we’re in this together -- We follow God, we trust our spiritual leaders, and we roll up our sleeves to make a difference for time and eternity. 

We want to unite as many people as possible as quickly as possible under the Jesus Flag through our Midland and Saginaw Campuses.

A life lived loving God bears lasting fruit,

for the one who is truly wise wins souls.” (Proverbs 11:30)

Security at The White House was TIGHT -- Secret Service was everywhere!

I discovered that it is very hard to get access to the Most Powerful Person on Earth.

Not so with God -- We have 24/7 access with no K-9’s and no Secret Service!

2. WE HAVE INSTANT ACCESS TO THE MOST POWERFUL PERSON IN EXISTENCE

 

"The one who walks in integrity

will experience a fearless confidence in life.” (Proverbs 10:9)

Wow, aren’t those words great? 

Don’t we all just want a fearless confidence in our everyday life? 

Spending time with God fuels up our faith and trust in Him!

"Lovers of truth follow the right path

because of their wonderment and worship of God.” (Proverbs 14:2-4)

“The words of the wise

will become a shield of protection around them.

The only clean stable is an empty stable.

So if you want the work of an ox and to enjoy an abundant harvest,

you’ll have a mess or two to clean up!” (Proverbs 14)

God loves when we gather together -- We gather on Sundays because that’s the day Jesus rose. 

Sometimes we’re going to make messes together -- and that’s okay! 

Proverbs says that the only CLEAN stable is an EMPTY stable --- look around you, this place is not empty!

As we all fumble forward in our faith, let’s give each other a break… let’s show each other grace as we are all learning together what it looks like to follow Christ day by day.

"To worship God in wonder and awe

opens a fountain of life within you,

empowering you to escape death’s domain.” (Proverbs 14:27)

I went to a White House Briefing -- It was all “Off the Record” -- Y’know, sometimes it is Hard to get clear info from Politicians!

Book of Proverbs = God is crystal clear with wisdom that applies to everyone, everywhere!

3. GOD GIVES US WISE ADVICE WHENEVER WE LOOK FOR IT!

"Wisdom soothes the heart of the one with living-understanding,

but the heart of the fool just stockpiles stupidity.” (Proverbs 14:33)

The Bible has a term for the person who refuses wise counsel: “fool." (Prov 12:15)    

When we refuse to listen, when we dodge the truth, when we insist on having our own way, we are fools.

"The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom." (Prov. 9:10) 

Wisdom begins with the recognition of who God is.
Wisdom begins when we recognize that God is God and then respond accordingly.

"Lovers of God hunger after truth,

but those without understanding

feast on foolishness and don’t even realize it.” (Proverbs 15:14)

"Go ahead and make all the plans you want,

but it’s the Lord who will ultimately direct your steps.

We are all in love with our own opinions,

convinced they’re correct.

But the Lord is in the midst of us,

testing and probing our every motive.

Before you do anything,

put your trust totally in God and not in yourself.

Then every plan you make will succeed.

The Lord works everything together to accomplish his purpose.” (Proverbs 16:1-5)

6 WORDS YOU NEED IN YOUR LEADERSHIP VOCABULARY

1. PATIENCE

• If you get too frustrated with the process, you’ll quit the mission God has given you.

• Just because you were patient one season, doesn’t mean you’ll be patient in the next.

• The patience you use for yourself should be the patience you use for others.

2. CONFRONTATION

• Confrontation is necessary for growth.

• When done well, it’s an opportunity to BUILD trust.

• If you tolerate things that are against your values, it says more about you than the other person.

3. RISK TAKING

• Anytime you step out to do something great, you have to count the cost.

• Great leaders are willing to take this risk rather than play it safe.

4. RECRUITING

• If you’re a good recruiter, you can SEE in others what they cannot see in THEMSELVES!

• Great leadership builds up great people without needing any of the credit.

5. ATTITUDE

• There are many things in leadership you can’t control, but what you CAN control is your attitude.

• A leader with a great attitude can lead through any situation.

6. EMPOWERING

• You can recruit, but can you give away and delegate responsibilities?

• The day of the lone ranger is done, the superhero in leadership is the one that empowers others!

4 Great Side-Effects When You Deal with Conflict Correctly

Conflict is a good thing. Any time you work with people, you can expect there to be some level of conflict. Most of us shy away from it, but it can actually lead to great team chemistry and trust. The consequences of not resolving conflict will always be greater than the reward. I would rather live in the small reward of conflict resolution than the vast consequences of never coming to resolution. 

Here are 4 things that conflict creates when resolved in a healthy way:

1. CONFLICT CREATES TRUST

• Avoiding conflict creates mistrust. 

• The pillars of a strong relationship are trust, communication, and respect. When I confront issues with people, it should build trust. We are choosing to not air out our grievances behind their back, but are willing to go straight to the source and provide constructive feedback. 

• Establish trust by being a leader that confronts issues. Commit to working through differences and being someone that builds them up. 

2. CONFLICT CREATES CLARITY

• Avoiding conflict creates questions. 

• Clarity eliminates confusion. Great leaders address the eggshells and clarify the ‘why’ and the expectations. Part of leadership is providing the guardrails that people live and lead within. Clarity brings safety. 

• Establish clarity by confronting issues when they happen and clarifying expectations or how their decision affected you.

3. CONFLICT CREATES CHEMISTRY

• Avoiding conflict creates awkwardness. 

• Conflict and resolution should lead to more trust which should lead to more chemistry. Any time I’ve had tough conversations with people, I leave feeling more connected. Remember this: You are one conversation away from solving the issue. Maybe your team lacks chemistry because there’s no confrontation.
  

• Establish chemistry by having tough conversations and holding others accountable.

4. CONFLICT CREATES CREATIVITY

• Avoiding conflict limits our ability to find a solution. 

• Most of us get stuck because we’re unwilling to address the issue. But when you confront the issue - whether it be with a person, finances, family, etc. - you can inspect the reality of the situation so that you can get creative in how to address it and move forward. 

• Establish creativity by being open enough to address the issue and look at it from a different perspective. 

Ultimately, the better we become at conflict resolution, the healthier our lives will be. Make it a goal for yourself to close the gap between your conflict and solutions. When we address the small things, it gives us the confidence to address the big things.

5 KEYS TO GROWING YOUR CHURCH IN 2023

Why are the things that USED to work not working now?

Why are most churches NOT growing right now?

1. The Great Reset happened - and it impacted almost every church. Culture shifts - pandemic, politically, racial strife, migration out of cities. People are rethinking everything.

2. America is becoming more post-Christian. Rise of the Nones.

3. You’ve shut down or throttled back your digital presence. This gets rid of your discoverability. Or it’s all about Sunday only.

4. What you offer digitally is the same as what you offer in-person.

5. The message isn’t the draw it used to be. Scarcity creates value and the message isn’t scarce since it’s online.

6. Hype isn’t cutting it anymore.

7. You’re focused on the wrong audience.

So how do you grow your church in this environment?

Key #1: Renew yourself and your team.
A lot of pastors are exhausted. Lots of grief. Lack of momentum is it’s own form of discouragement. Healthy leaders grow healthy churches. Unhealthy leaders don’t. What do you need to do to become a healthy leader? Grieve your losses and process everything you’ve been through. Healthy at the top, healthy at the bottom. Aligned at the top, aligned at the bottom. Healthy people aren’t attracted to unhealthy leaders or organizations.

Key #2: Renew your mission. Work on your mission until it burns white hot. Identify a big problem you are trying to solve. Renew or define the founder/problem fit.

Key #3: Make digital and in-person each more distinctive. Make in-person more personal. Make in-person a non-downloadable, transcendent experience. “You kinda had to be there.”

Key #4: Elevate community. We’re drowning in a world of content. Nobody should be able to out-community the local church. Relationships are sticky; they make you stick around!

Key #5: Identify and scale your biggest growth barrier.
Barriers emerge at 200, 400, and 800 attenders:

• 200 Barrier: Pastoral care – scale your pastoral care. The key to pastoral care is having someone who cares. It doesn’t have to be the pastor.

• 400 Barrier: Staffing – Hire leaders, not doers.

• 800 Barrier: Governance and push-down decision making. Staff-led, elder-protected, people gifted.

• Identify your biggest growth barrier and how you intend to scale it.

Holy Shift Excerpt: Think Ensemble in Your Leadership

"You know what intimacy is? It's into-me-you-see.” - Martin de Maat

The original pioneers of improv-comedy in the 1950s included now-famous names like Alan Arkin, Mike Nichols, and a very young Joan Rivers. A famous story from the annals of Second City recounts how Rivers was once on stage and asked for an audience suggestion for a scene. When "marriage" was shouted back, Joan initiated the scene by saying, "I want a divorce." Joan’s on-stage partner said Yes, And to her initiation by saying, “What about the children?” Joan shot back,“We don’t have any children!”

Of course, there was a big laugh from the audience, but Rivers' cheap laugh set up her partner—and the scene—for failure. Her denial of his reality killed the scene and ended the team’s collaboration. She destroyed more than future possibilities in the scene; Rivers denied and destroyed the trust between partners.

It's time to make a Holy Shift in your leadership through a crucial comedy technique.  I want you to Think Ensemble. 

Teamwork makes the dream work. In the comedy world, you are taught to always, always, always make your partner look good. It’s not about sharing the spotlight; it is about moving the spotlight completely off of yourself and more brightly onto everyone else on the stage. It’s the comedic equivalent of valuing community. Improvisation is about serving your partner instead of being out there and showing off.

Have you ever watched an episode of Whose Line Is It Anyway?  Have you noticed how the comics don’t have time to sit down, write out their ideas, memorize lines, re-write lines? It’s because they Start with a Yes and build on the idea by thinking ensemble.

You don’t know what is going to come out of your partner’s mouth—whatever they say in an improv scene instantly becomes the reality of the scene.  Therefore, you want to build a net of trust to leap into—and that trust is knit together by the knowledge that you will always support one another, no matter what. 

When you think ensemble, your church will build effective teams, break down silos, and foster creativity. Ensemble gives you an instantaneous advantage with different situations; the outcome isn’t dependent on one lone person. Thinking ensemble strengthens the Body. 

Think of an ensemble as a baseball team. You don’t want to load your roster with all sluggers. You need different points of view and complementary strengths. Diversity is the key to thinking ensemble. The enemies of thinking ensemble are the need to be right, stealing focus, and appearing to be in control. Jesus’ disciples were always short-circuiting things when they felt the need to be right (Peter), tried stealing the focus (James and John), or were appearing to be in control (Judas the treasurer).

Ensemble is hard, but rewarding. When nobody cares who gets the credit, your team is able to explore and heighten new ideas together. When you think of winning sports teams, the championship is won not by a single athlete, but by a team of players working together. The burden is shared and the win is shared. When you think ensemble, you are freed to walk into a meeting and bring a brick, not a cathedral.

RELATIONSHIPS ARE NOT DISPOSABLE IN A FACEBOOK WORLD

Thinking ensemble looks easy on paper but is hard in real life. Why? Because we live in the time of Facebook and Twitter, two mighty platforms that can amplify messages—and amplify grudges—if handled immaturely. And believe me, social media can be like crack for immaturity addicts.

I have a theory: we never really leave middle school. That short season of life where the awkwardness of adolescence collides with our first tastes of personal responsibility follows us through life. Many men are still that boy in the junior high locker room comparing and many women walk through life fearful of others’ opinions. We have the popular kids (Hollywood), the geeks (ComicCon), the need for cooler toys (Amazon), and petty schoolyard fights (political races). We never really leave middle school. Social media simply amplifies our inner middle school angst.

Angry at someone? Technology doesn’t force you to seek reconciliation; you can simply “UnFollow” them. They won’t even know. Facebook has made relationships disposable, just another product to consume and spit out.

That’s why thinking ensemble is so explosive: relationships are vital toward forward progress. When you sign up to be a leader, you signup for conflict. Thinking ensemble directs you to walk toward the people there is conflict with, not away from them (you can’t support someone you’re not talking to). In the Bible, we read these words about conflict:

For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places.” Ephesians 6:12 (ESV)

The Gospel reminds us that we are messy humans who easily fall into sin. Our flesh can sometimes seek to judge before our spirit listens. But Ephesians 6:12 reminds us that if it has flesh and blood, it is not your enemy. If you are holding anger toward someone or unwilling to revisit boundaries you've set up, it's time to wake up to the fact that that person is not your enemy. They are a human being created in the image of God whom Jesus already died for and the Father has already declared to be not guilty.

Reconciliation is not something you can put off. Biblically, it is always for today. As I gently remind our church periodically, the Internet is an online tool for building community, but should never be used for tearing it down. Here is an axiom to live by: if you ever feel wronged by someone (a fellow Christ follower, a church staff member, a pastor, etc.), posting your grievance online is never the correct course of action. In fact, if someone is willing to attack another person through a blog hiding behind flickering pixels but refuses to meet with them in person, we have a word for that: coward.

EDITOR’S NOTE: The has been an excerpt from my book, Holy Shift. I lead what has been recognized as one of America’s fastest-growing churches, LifeChurchMichigan.com. Part of my training was at The Second City in Chicago.

Holy Shift is about unleashing contagious enthusiasm on church leadership teams; equipping leaders to leverage laughter and passion; and creating sustainable momentum in reaching younger crowds for Christ.

Order copies for your team now on Amazon or ChurchLeaders.com!

Last Train is the Best Train

UPDATED:

I apologize and celebrate that The Monkees are NOT, in fact, retiring! Thank you, Micky, for your correction via Twitter.

---

I have attended NINE concerts with either the full Monkees playing or solo concerts from the likes of Davy Jones and Micky Dolenz.

None of them (I repeat, none of them) packed the emotional whallop on display from Michael Nesmith during The Monkees’ Farewell Tour stop in Detroit this past week.

Michael Nesmith of The Monkees at The Masonic Temple in Detroit, Michigan on Tuesday, November 3, 2021

It is unfortunate that there has been so much online chatter and rumors regarding Nesmith’s recent health scares. Yes, it is true that Nez was sans guitar on this tour stop. Yet what he lacked in guitar strumming he more than made up for with his quirky impersonations, slap-stick comments, and authentic displays of heartfelt gratitude toward fans during this farewell to fans of the Pre-Fab Four.

Full Confession: I’ve always been a fan of Micky Dolenz. His hijincks on reruns of the 1960’s hit tv show enthralled my imagination as a child of the 80’s.

From the moment I first saw Micky singing I’m A Believer during Walt Disney World’s 15th Anniversary Special, I was hooked on the comedy genius as well as the hit songs.

What struck me during this final appearance of The Mike & Micky Show was how Micky and Mike traded roles within the band.

Whereas Mike was the straight man for so many years to Micky’s wild and crazy antics, the proverbial tables were turned in this final outing: it was Nesmith who kept the audience in stitches with energy and delight (as you can see in the above and below bootleg videos I filmed during the concert!).

Fedora-clad showman Micky instead was the defacto maestro who kept every song on pitch and moving along deftly.

Micky Dolenz and Michael Nesmith in Detroit, Michigan on November 3, 2021

The song selections were rich and deep with a fine back-up band keeping the beat. My only regret in this final outing was the lack of any stage design. I would have loved to have seen the giant video-screen from the 2012 tour days or even the giant neon Monkees guitar from 1996 (pictured below). I’m sure the choice for stage simplicity was a function of cutting costs during touring.

Davy Jones, Peter Tork, and Micky Dolenz in Moline, Illinois during an August 1996 tour.

Will we see any future incarnation of The Monkees? Only time will tell.

As Dolenz has often shared in interviews, “We’ve always joked that we would sing Hey, Hey We’re The Monkees until there was only one of us left. In that case, they would sing, Hey, Hey It’s A Monkee!”